Can you tell the person within your family that you are the very closest to exactly how your husband treats you behind closed doors? They may support him because they believe only the side of him they see, and are completely unaware of the side of him that he presents to you when they aren't around. Stay strong, because your daughter is watching you and learning from you.

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that is an extremely controlling husband that you have. He planned all of that along time ago. He intentially cut you off from your family and friends so he could lock you up with him. He thinks he is the most amazing thing on earth and wants everyone else to think that too.

The next time he lays a hand on you, call 911. Although your mom and sis may think spousal abuse is normal and fine, the police won't. Think of what your daughter is learning by watching this. You can be the one to break the cycle.

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oh no. I was not being sarcastic at all! I am sorry if you read it that way. I just know people like that. He makes you feel guilty and that it is all your fault. But its not! He wants to control you by any means he can. Its not a healty situation to be in

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Please try to imagine what your daughter's life would be like if you weren't here. Just her asshole dad and nobody else. You don't want to do that to her. Contact an abuse hotline. Ask them to help you make a plan to leave him.

It might seem impossible but you can get out! Please try?

Your daughter needs you. If you were to leave this earth who will watch over her and make sure the abuse doesn't happen to her as well. I know that I am not in your shoes. It is scarey but you need to get out. Make a plan. Seek a shelter. If you can find a way, go to the hospital. They will put you in touch with a shelter. You need to prove to your daughter that you are better than this. I know financially it is scarey as well because you have a roof over your head but if you leave you will start a new life which will help your self esteem. You will make new friends that will be there to help you.

soft is so right!!

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Sorry to hear Hun, u need to make a run for it and try to get some help b4 it gets bad the best for u n ur daughter no body needs to control their love ones like that I am sorry

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well the pills are not helping so the only thing that will really help is getting out of the situation. so you can see that you are a good person. You said so yourself:) Just the fact that you seek help shows that. You would never want to end your own life if mister jackwagon didnt tell you that you were worthless all the time

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Try to go to a Chruch for some help Hun there is help out there and caring people who will help u n ur daughter

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How old is ur daughter? There's gonna b a way to get out of it. If u want to u gonna do it. I know if I was I would of left rift away!

Ya but u said ur daughter is the one keeping u alive!

I get that. emotional pain is worse than physical pain because it lasts so much longer. your bruises go away. People do care about you. he has just tucked you away for so long they think you are fine

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If u want help ur the one who's gonna get it just keep ur head up high and stay strong

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ill be your friend

I got a close friend that's been there for 18 yrs and she was sucidial and its took her yrs to get help just for herself not me but for her. Until this day she is happy living back w her mom got a car going back to college and everything. I understand where ur coming from about the friend issue. But on this site u will found sweet caring people that will care and b there for u no matter what u just gonna gave it time

I got a close friend that's been there for 18 yrs and she was sucidial and its took her yrs to get help just for herself not me but for her. Until this day she is happy living back w her mom got a car going back to college and everything. I understand where ur coming from about the friend issue. But on this site u will found sweet caring people that will care and b there for u no matter what u just gonna gave it time

I got a close friend that's been there for 18 yrs and she was sucidial and its took her yrs to get help just for herself not me but for her. Until this day she is happy living back w her mom got a car going back to college and everything. I understand where ur coming from about the friend issue. But on this site u will found sweet caring people that will care and b there for u no matter what u just gonna gave it time

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Rk

Oh rk, things will be ok I know it's hard to deal with life but all u can keep doing is stay strong and keep ur head up high n try loving each day and Urself and ur daughter I am here if u need to talk

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Verbal & emotional abuse can become Very Creepy. You know it isn't just using profane language. My husband was downright frightening especially when he lost control and before he left in the most confusing and emotionally brutal way he could. What has effected me the nost is attempts to alter and control my perceptions. It is called crazy making. He did this to our child as well. I stepped in which did not go well either.

It,s weird crazy stuff. Laughing a creepy laugh, while running upstairs skipping a step, locking himself the bedroom, and barricading the door with furniture. Pretending what he Clearly Just Said had not been. In fact that he had not said Anything. Also that conversations we had never occurred. Just about drove me crazy. I began documenting conversations with the date abd time we had them. I did this to save My sanity. I signed the paper and asked him too as well. This really pissed him off. He would not so I wrote ,"X refused to sign." It was really scary. I became petty bold when I realized that I gone through for so many years. For some reason this Really Really hurt and still bothers me. He told me something that was not true and I pointed out that he was lying. He said,"I didn't lie. I only said it to you." That makes me absolutely sick to my stomach.

Call 911. My husband said he was calling 911 because I pushed his finger into hot oil. He had burned himself cooking. My kid was in the room and we did not know. He said, "No she did not!" I retained an attorney the next day babe. They are psychologically not well. I feel it can only become worse. He left but at least I had retained an attorney before he did. Stay safe and what your family thinks is not important. You and your daughter are important. I do not believe his behavior will improve. In my case it escalated when I figured out what it was. Why everything had always been chaotic and confusing. I learned how to not allow his control and after a strong escalation and explosive exit he is Gone. Court is gong to be a real party.(sarcasm)smile

Find an Al Anon meeting. Taught me how to regain my thought process. Took my child to Al Teen as well. They might can even bring a meeting to you. You must meet these people. I don't know what condition I would be in currently had I not walked through those doors. They taught me about writing down and dating the conversations to help me learn to trust myself and my memory which was greatly harmed. Please be careful. My situation was escalating. Go to church. Find people, you need people. There is Always someone who will help you. Keep asking. You will be fine. Do these things for you and your daughter please.smile

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LEARN to drive in the snow! Al Anon assignment, I was to LEARN to drive in the stupid city. It was horrible, lost, turned around, cried, but I did it until I could. I was desperate. It was the only way. I had to change, Difficult. God bless you. Message if you would like.

Yes I know. Oh how I know. Find People. Check to see if Al Anon has meetings online for people who have difficulty getting out. Develop a new interest, Church. Attend & meet people. You are the parent and it is your decision that she go too. ell her this is best for her and she is going. She may love it. I will ask my home group about online meeting. I believe they started them not that long ago. He sounds really Hot. I became perhaps too bold. I was so pissed off when I figured out what he was doing. I was not afraid physically until the end.

You need to Learn to Drive in the snow. If you aren't mobile you can't protect yourself or your child. You need an exit plan already in place when you need to go. I kept a bag packed in car for my child and myself. And yes I ended up needing it. It would have been better to have called 911 and then left. I was a nervous wreck and I didn't. But I did have the ability to drive, possessions packed, and enough cash to get a room for a couple of nights. Now i have evidence documenting we had to leave the home late at night.

Take care sweetie.

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Ull b ok

I am a good person and I am sitting here alone.smile I love your SG picture!

I am a little nervous about the weekend Much is going on. Plans for Thanksgiving have not worked out as I wish so far. I love it that we are the only country that has a day set aside to recognize what we have to be thankful for. We ALL have something to be grateful for. Intend to make a 100 item gratitude list on Thanksgiving. Even if it as basic as toothbrush, clean running water, deodorant, and toilet paper! Basic is not unimportant now is it? Can you imagine life without these four basic items? They will be first on my 100 list.smile

Time, planning, attitude, combined can change your circumstances. Not a quick fix sweetie. I guess I am at the beginning of the middle of a fix. Where ever we are the process required does not become easier but it brings us closer to where we want to be.

Thinking of you. Messaged. Bye Bye

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I am glad to here you begin having a dream for yourself. I get little glimmers here and there. I would like to move from where I live. I would like to live in a smaller area. I would like to live in the floatland so I can ride my bike without having to be muscle women. I would like an easy going simple life. Down with city traffic!smile Me, working on it. smiles. I will message!

Please, please, forgive me But I won't be home again Maybe someday you'll look up And barely conscious, you'll say to no one "Isn't something missing?”
You won't cry for my absence, I know You forgot me long ago Am I that unimportant? Am I so insignificant? Isn't something missing? Isn't someone missing me?
Even though I'm the sacrifice You won't try for me, not now Though I'd die to know you love me I'm all alone Isn't someone missing me?
Please, please, forgive me But I won't be home again I know what you do to yourself I breathe deep and cry out "Isn't something missing? Isn't someone missing me?"
Even though I'm the sacrifice You won't try for me, not now Though I'd die to know you love me I'm all alone Isn't someone missing me?
And if I bleed, I'll bleed Knowing you don't care And if I sleep just to dream of you I'll wake without you there Isn't something missing? Isn't something
Even though I'm the sacrifice You won't try for me, not now Though I'd die to know you love me I'm all alone Isn't something missing? Isn't someone missing me?

Read more: EVANESCENCE - MISSING LYRICS

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I stopped crying for a long time. Also am pretty damned proud of each and every tear I feel rolling down my face. I worked hard to be able to cry, to feel what I needed to feel. NOT always fun. I love music but for me sometimes it will magnify expand my negative mindset. Don't need to expand that!

Happy to see you posted! byebye

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I am enjoying a Huge Bag of peanut M&Ms & a Coke. It is nice to be able to feel. Every thing but fear which I do not like. No longer even aware that I felt NOTHING. I actually was so busy "managing everything,and surviving, fixing," that I Truly had No Idea how Wrong I felt. I bottled up So Much Anger, and didn't even realize it.ha People who barely knew me said they were "Afraid of Me!" So Funny. I have a very soft voice and there is absolutely nothing frightening about me. Sometimes people from AA would attend an Al Anon meeting. Later they confided, "I took one look at you and knew there was No Way my family would Ever be able to forgive me." I laughed! They celled me a "Rolling Ball Of Rage!" And boy was I, when I emerged from my "comfy & warm little Cocoon of Self Deception!" I got to meet that Rolling Ball of Rage Face to Face. I was one pissed off girl! I managed by digging a hole, filling it back up, over and over until I was too tired to stand or maintain my the anger. Whew. Wouldn't trade it for that soft Deceptively safe cocoon. When time came to Feel my Pain, it was almost Overwhelming. I honestly thought I Would Die I was Hurting So Much. Really DIE, not just being a drama queen. Each and everyday I saw that I was still breathing and the pain had not killed me. Interesting. No longer afraid to feel emotional pain. To let it out!

Oh well, chatter chatter, it is late as usual for me! I will go now and watch a little TV. Tomorrow my son has a birthday!smile I hope you have a good tomorrow! bye bye